堅強 Be Strong

回憶起自認成熟卻懵懵懂懂的時期,當時我剛完成高中學業,對於一切感到迷惘,四十多年前的經濟情勢和現在大不相同,學歷似乎顯得一點也不重要,在這個資訊爆炸的年代我們很難想見當初獲取知識有多麼困難,從前,大自然對我們來說是神祕、未知的,而對自然抱持著無知與天真的想法往往讓我們輕易失去性命,我在高中最後一年時前往蒙特婁當交換生,在那邊我結交一位名叫Peter Mapalant的好友,他在完成學業後來到我成長的小島定居、工作,在相當夯的漁業撈金。

一晚,他和一位同事約好乘著小船在類似挪威海峽的岩岸划行,現在處於光害的們或許很難想像岩岸旁那種不見五指的黑暗,不幸的事情發生了,小船由於重心不穩翻覆,將我朋友及同伴一同帶入海中,太平洋的海水溫度即使在夏天都還是會讓你在全身被海水包覆時奪走你的感知,當下兩個人都照著本能游往自認最近的岸邊,可惜我朋友在情急之下選擇了錯誤的方向,那個錯誤的方向引領他到另外一個世界。他的遺體始終無法被尋獲,意外發生後他的姐妹和父親立刻趕到我們家借住一個月,在這一個月的時間每天就在岩岸徘徊試圖找尋奇蹟,即使搜救團隊撤離他們仍不放棄,我對他們的家庭感到遺憾,最後仍一無所獲。

這件事的發生對我的打擊相當大,Peter這個獨一無二的人就這樣在這個世上消失,我為此深思許久而得到一個啟發,每個人應該要在人生中找到自己的任務並且去實踐、完成它。你想虛度光陰,過著行屍走肉的生活是你的自由;你想追尋理想,過著逐夢踏實的生活也是你的自由。沒有人可以阻止你想成為怎麼樣的一個人。但要記住,你的朋友和家人雖然可以從旁協助你,你是唯一一個可以將火炬帶到終點的人。

人生的經歷讓我可以輕描淡寫這些大道理,但將這些訊息傳遞給學生卻是不那麼容易的,許多台灣學生都被指引向錯誤的未來,我記得早年的學生都被灌輸這兩樣概念:第一,他們必須相信自己是獨一無二、在這個世上是最美的個體,這只的當然不是外表而是內在;第二,他們必須為自己的教育負責,意指其實我們才是自己最佳的導師。Laurence Steinberg博士說道:有一樣在學校能力或智力測驗無法測出的東西就是我們的決心及堅持。推薦一本名為Man’s Search for Meaning的書,此書以作者的集中營經歷為本,揭示人類生命的動力在於尋出意義;人只要參透為何而活,即能承受任何煎熬;而無論處境如何,亦皆有自由抉擇的餘地。

When I arrived at my own Existential Angst, (1) I had just finished high school in Canada and, to be fair, was totally lost. There was so much money in the Western economy 40 years ago that a further education seemed pointless: now what? You often hear that the defining zeitgeist of our present age is too much information. Imagine a time with too little knowledge. Globally, we have now subdued nature, for the most part. Not at this time. Nature was forbidding and foreboding. It did not suffer fools gladly and snuffed the life out of the careless and naïve. I went on an exchange trip (2) to Montreal in my last year of school. I befriended a fellow student, Peter Mapalant. He came to visit our tiny village on Vancouver Island after he had completed his secondary schooling and decided to stay, and work in the fishing industry. Commercial salmon harvesting was paying large crew shares (3) at the time.

Inexplicably, one night he and a colleague decided to go for a canoe ride on the edge of one of the numerous inlets that punctuate this part of the coast, similar to Norwegian fjords. We are now so inundated with light pollution (4) that it is virtually impossible to understand darkness or “pitch black,” as we say in Canadian slang. As fate would have it, the boat flipped over, throwing them both into the sea. The Pacific Ocean is stunningly cold even in summer and at first contact “shocks” your system, producing instant disorientation. Not knowing where they were and not being able to see, they swam to what they perceived to be the nearest shore: my friend swan in the wrong direction. The cruelest twist to this tragic story was that his body was never found. His sister and father came and stayed in our home for almost a month, valiantly scouring the shoreline day after painstaking day, long after the official search had ended. It was an unbelievable shame and the waste of a budding life, and for his family no finality – no closure.

The extreme fickleness and arbitrariness of life was thrust in my face and imbedded in my consciousness. There was no one like Peter in the world — no one – and now he was expunged. It thus occurred to me that it was your task in life to discover your mission and to act on it. If you wanted to live out a pointless, useless existence, however, that was also an option. If you desired something more dynamic and exciting, that was your option too. But, it became patently obvious that there would be no one holding your hand. You were on your own. Now to be fair, our friends and family are there to assist us; in spite of this, it is the individual who must carry his own torch.

This is very easy to say when you’re an old man. But is it much more difficult to impart to young and not-so-young students. Many Taiwanese students are being given a very false view of the future, a future that cannot be achieved without effort and without work. I believe that at an early age every student must be given a two-fold mental injection: Firstly, they must believe that they are unique and the most beautiful person that they know (not physically, but spiritually and psychologically). Secondly, they must accept responsibility for their education (the only true teacher being the self). ”Man’s search for meaning is the primary motivation in his life and not a ‘secondary rationalization’ of instinctual drives. This meaning is unique and specific in that it must and can be fulfilled by him alone; only then does it achieve a significance that will satisfy his own ‘will’ to meaning.” (5) Dr. Laurence Steinberg (b. 1952), noted psychologist and author of the seminal book Age of Opportunity (ISBN 978-0-544-27977-3) leaves us with a thought: One of the reasons that tests of intelligence, talent or ability don’t predict much in school, work, or life is that they don’t measure characteristics like determination, persistence or ’grit’. … Determination involves conscientiousness, stamina, and sustained commitment.”

A small joke: One new mother said to another, “My daughter is so smart that at seven months old, she could walk.”That’s nothing,” the other woman replied. “Our son is so smart that at six months old he made us carry him.”

This week, please ponder your own level of drive and determination.

Every day look for something magical and beautiful.

Quote: Ask yourself: if you only had but one life to live would you choose the most adventurous and potentially rewarding cobblestoned road or would you opt for the mundane and the trivial muddy path?

Footnotes:

1) Existential Angst comes upon a person when they have total freedom of action and there must accept the consequences of thoses actions.

2) An exchange trip, in this context, is when a group of students stays with another group of students, perhaps in another city or country. Usually this action is reciprocated at a later date.

3) A crew share is how the proceeds of the fishing catch are allotted amongst the crew: the captain getting the largest share and the inexperienced deckhand the least, with the other crew members paid according to experience and seniority

4) Light pollution is a worldwide phenomenon created by excessive, obtrusive or continuous artificial light.  .

5).Dr. Viktor E. Frankl (1905-1997): Man’s Search For Meaning, pg.99 (ISBN: 9-7806-7164-670-7)