Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty together again. Well, this is a riddle originally. And the question is, who is Humpty Dumpty?
And the answer of course is an egg. But it truly typifies failure, doesn’t it? Because Humpty Dumpty cannot be put back together again. And I think all of us have experienced this in life. Severe failure when we’re just stunned and we’re forced to stand back and ask, now what?
This could be a business failure, perhaps a romantic failure, a failure at school, but it stuns us. It really hurts. The wounds are painful for a certain period of time. And after a while, we find ourselves at a crossroads, don’t we? We either decide, I’m going to get over this, I am, somehow, I’m going to go forward, or I’m not.
I’m going to be broken and scarred by this for the rest of my life. And all one has to do is to take a walk in some of the darker sides of any North American city, and you’ll see the people that have answered that riddle in a negative way. They are failures. They are victims. And they dull themselves many times with alcohol, drugs, prostitution, really the dark things of life.
Right? But let us assume that we’re not one of those people and thank God most of us are not. So what do we do? Well, the very first thing I think we must do is of course acknowledge that this is truly happened to me, not to you. I’ve read about this.
Other people have experienced this, but this has never happened to me. But now it has. So I must take stock of the reality. This has happened. And usually, my routine, if I’ve had one, has been knocked away, taken away.
Perhaps I’ve moved house or I’ve been forced to leave my school, whatever it is. So, I must establish a new routine as quickly as I can. I must begin once again to get up in the morning, make my bed, whatever it is. I must write in my notebook, say my prayers, and get on with the day. And if it is to resolve a crisis or to find a new job or whatever.
But start with that routine because that routine will stabilize you. And certainly, if you have a bit of the religious side to you, prayers are very good at this point. Very good. So, accept the reality, find a routine and then manage your emotions. Gosh.
Your heart is palpitating. You feel anger perhaps, sickness in your heart, visceral feeling of loss. Somehow you gotta manage those emotions because they will poison you. They are toxic. No question at all.
Get to a gym if you can. If not, get to a park. Get to a pool, but somehow calm those emotions down. And also learn to talk to yourself. This failure has happened to other people, not only you.
Whatever that failure may or may not be. It’s happened to other people and they overcame that loss, that failure. They did and they became successful again and you can too. Yes, you can. Just get on with it.
Talk to yourself. Self talk at this point is extremely important. Really. You’re not a bad person. You’re not.
Yes. You failed. And, yes, other people are laughing at you now. They’re very smug in your failure. But so what?
Do not be smug to yourself. Talk to that inner voice that tells you, I can do it. I’m not one of those people that have taken the other option. I’m a winner in my heart. I’m a winner.
And, of course, if you want, why did you fail? Now I would not at this moment because you’re too sensitive. I wouldn’t really get totally into it. But realize some perhaps in a superficial sense, some of the mistakes you have made perhaps in the relationship or in the business, whatever it is. Superficially, make a note of those in your notebook.
And, of course, this is 100% my fault. So you must take responsibility. No question again. Right? And, you know, once again, like any tree, we’ve seen the trees in the forest.
They have a lots of knots on them, bumps and bruises. I think human beings are the same. We get beaten up, but we still grow tall into the forest, into the future. Bless yourself. Really?
And then what? What are my new goals? Well, at the moment, I don’t know. I just don’t know. Gosh.
How can I have goals? What are you talking about? And here, people like Mark Twain assist us. They suggest, I get a piece of paper, what I’m good at, what I’m bad at. Write down these details.
I’m good at talking. I’m not so good at people. Document it now more than ever, and then begin. Do not wallow in your pain. Get off.
Look for a new job. Look for a new school. Look for a new relationship if you so desire. And once again, be patient with the beautiful you because it will all be fine. Once again, from John Lennon, it will all be fine in the end.
And if it’s not fine, it’s not the end. Right? And then I think it’s really good to get to the library or perhaps go on the Internet and find someone who’s had stunning losses like Mark Twain. Stunning losses and he overcame, in his case, adversity to go on to be a successful man. A successful man in the end.
Right? You know, so you gotta keep a perspective on life. It’s not a short life. It’s a very, very, very long and interesting life. And these failures, these instances of pain, you’re going to be able to share in twenty years with other people.
You are going to be a teacher and a mentor to other students or people having relationship crises or business people because you have experienced it. You’ve been there on your knees and you decided either to lie down and lie flat and disappear or somehow stand up again. Slowly begin to walk and then begin to run and you’re off. You’re off on the great marathon of life. So the answer to Humpty Dumpty is, of course, yes, Humpty Dumpty can be fixed.
You can fix yourself. You can live a determined and brilliant life with these kinds of experiences or after these kinds of experiences. You’re a winner. I think it’s important to realize this. There’s no one like me.
There never has been and there never will be. But now I must get on with me. And you know what they say. You know what they say. Critical thinking is necessary, especially when you want to overcome failure, and critical thinking is great. Truly great, especially at this moment of pain. So you take care. God bless. Bye bye.