Isn’t human nature fascinating? You are in the throes of despair – a lost love, a failed interview, a dearth of money or a surfeit of angst, etc., etc. Then something occurs: you receive a wonderful email, someone smiles solicitously, you are blessed by the wind and the rain, you wake up refreshed — whatever it is — and suddenly, once again, you are thrust into the bosom of happiness. This suggests that one of human existence’s greatest pillars – happiness – is real and intrinsic to us all. We are all naturally happy as opposed to morose. As is oft stated, one definition of happiness is “the joy you feel in doing what you love in the service of yourself or others.” Hopefully, the latter is more important than the former.
Universal Truths
I am in awe of universal truths. They are never ephemeral. Try as you might, they are impossible to break or alter. They are just true. The one that my grandfather continually reinforced was that “You create your own reality.” This, of course, does not mean that you can necessarily alter your physical reality. I can improve it, but a radical change is often difficult, to say the least. My mental state, however, I can change. The emphasis here is on the “I” – I can change – there is no one else who changes me but me. I do this by altering my reality – the way I see the world. We have the severe example of Dr. Frankl in the death camp. (1) He changed his perception and survived when most didn’t.
Can you feel the rain?
Sometimes I feel like one enormous “stick in the mud.” I am convinced that this is how that thing called age begins. Ask anyone over fifty and they will tell you that age is not in your physical body but in some cerebral place between your ears. I used “to scoff” at the adage, “You are only as old as you think you are.” It is pointedly true but you have to qualify in chronological years to understand it. Socrates, perhaps, said at his trial, to paraphrase, “I know that I know nothing.” (1) As I approach his age (he died at seventy), that does not sound like such a useless tautology. (2) It is true, but many of us, as our hair whitens, submerge ourselves in our own smugness and think we know something when we don’t. Any trifling glance at most political statements and this belief will be but reinforced.
Relationships are not easy
I am sure this is a very common experience: we slowly begin to open our perceptual eyes at twenty or so and quickly come to realize that there are many other forms in the world. Some appear to be inanimate like rocks or mountains or the sky, and others are animate and scurry, jump or fly about. Whatever their agitation, we quickly comprehend that everything is separate and distinct from me. A freshet of fear and loneliness is presented — then it calms and then it dissipates. You realize that you are alone in the world.
Age is your gift
One of the great advantages of age is that you often feel as if you are living in history — your history, of course. You are able to sit back and review your life – its machinations and its missteps – along with its triumphs and glories. I am reading a newly published book entitled Aristotle’s Way. (1) The author, Edith Hall, discusses the main premise that Aristotle thought we should live our life by — that is, one of happiness. I think it is a basic truth that all thinking and reflective beings want to be happy. You must immediately ask the question: why then, are most not? The answer is that we don’t believe we can be content unless we attain some mythical point in the future – the juncture where enough money, the perfect relationship, social achievement, etc., all coalesce. Until we arrive at this point, we are unhappy, “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and die with their song still inside them.” to misquote David Henry Thoreau (1817-1862).
Education is my responsibility
Education: As the new school semester begins, this topic is on the minds of many people, students, parents and educators, alike. What is it; how do we improve it and why, formally, do we really need it? Well, the latter question is being answered by young people worldwide — including North America — with their feet. They are quitting high school in droves, (1) though this may be improving (It is important to note that the statics are not consistent in all studies). The corollary to all of this is that, “More than two in every five young people in today’s workforce are unemployed or are working but poor, a striking reality that is impacting society across the world.”(2) Why? We continuously hear the old canard that the marketplace has changed and we are not preparing our young people for a new, dynamic and ever-changing economic reality, etc., etc. I think that this is overly simplistic.
Patience is a virtue
Do you ever have one of those days that you have just had enough? I do. It seems to be the inevitable consequence of “the best of times,” as Dickens (1) tells us. The stars seem to be in perfect alignment with your being: everything clicks, as they say. Your universe is in synchronicity with your mission in life. You know these moments.
Those moments of life
It is those reflective moments of life that matter. They grab and transport us to another place, another dimension of thought. They do not exist in a vacuum; however, they must be stimulated by social interaction. “I am my own teacher.” This I believe emphatically. That said: we learn from every external circumstance, external to the inner me, that is. Stifle communication and you do so at your peril. This is why our guides – our friends and family – are so necessary. They are concomitant with the people that we meet on a daily basis – the shopkeeper, the colleague at school or work and the person we sit beside on the bus or airplane. They all teach us something when engaging them in the discussion. That said, our world is dynamic and the art of dialogue is undergoing a change. Will the result be positive or negative, only time will give us the answer?
What should I believe?
It is often said that you are responsible for your life. Whatever comes of this piece of existence is my accomplishment or my failure. Noted author and speaker, Dr. Wayne Dyer (1940-2015) tells us, “Everything you do is based on the choices you make. It’s not your parents, your past relationships, your job, the economy, the weather, an argument or your age that is to blame. You and only you are responsible for every decision and choice you make: Period!” This is somewhat true, but it is certainly not the whole picture. I think that we must question the totality of this statement. All of us, especially when we are young, are in desperate need of a mentor — someone who can give us a “role model” to pattern our life on. I must understand how to be me; or at the very least, I must learn how to decipher my gifts. These skills are not innate though, I must be taught.
My life: cool and exciting!
The colder season is upon us – winter has begun to intrude into our lives. I find that the weather covers people with a curious psychological pallor. Everyone appears to be more reflective, more contemplative — some deeply immersed in their own thoughts — obviously creating their plan for the unfolding year. This always creates a strange dilemma, doesn’t it? On the one hand, we must answer the question – “When is the best time of my life?”