Have you ever had this kind of startling experience? You awaken from a dream and for a moment — just for a moment — you are totally lost and disoriented. I recently experienced such a phenomenon. I first felt as if I was not the person that I knew. But then, I quickly returned to myself and my familiar surroundings and sensations – these included the comfort of my bed. My momentary sense of visceral panic was replaced with a serene understanding that all was well in my universe. I would continue to exist for yet another day. This concept of psychological chaos is omnipresent in everyone’s life, I believe, and can be easily replicated once we leave the protection of our home. A walk in any shopping center or congested venue can quickly evoke a feeling of being overwhelmed.
Why am I here and where am I going? Extrapolate this to life and you replicate the kind of mental trauma that our society seems to specialize in. (1) But why must we believe that bedlam and confusion have to be associated with life? The concept of an out-of-control, peripatetic, society is continuously reinforced by the speed of the Internet, the ubiquity of ever-changing neon images, and, of course, our travels, to name but a few. We can be (or could be) anywhere in the world in under 24 hours. Is this, however, how civilization must truly exist? I think not. We can and must slow down – both metaphorically and physically. This, nonetheless, requires a modicum of planning.
When we are young, life is peaceful and imaginative. If we think back to our very first moments of consciousness, most of us would say that it was an enjoyable time, a period that was quite idyllic. This descends into a chaotic stage of school, studies, pressure, and confusion. Life becomes much like a spinning top. (2) Though in time and with maturity, the mechanism diminishes in speed and intensity – it does take on a sense of order and, seemingly, becomes more manageable. We know, for example, that we must attend school every day. But, as beings, we continue to spin — virtually uncontrollably. Ask people of any age, what their life mission is and few can give a definitive answer – in reality, confusion reigns supreme. It takes a period of reflection to realize that these ferocious fluctuations, apparently a part of life, are not self-sustaining. This bewilderment does not have to be my reality. I can be in control of my present and my future – but how?
To begin, I must merely realize that I create my own reality. I do not have to do anything – get up in the morning, go to school or to work, or strive for any fictitious goals – be they scholastic or financial. These are 100% my decisions – whether I believe this or not. This one simple realization should allow me to calm down. Of course, everything has consequences. If I decide to not go to school, I will fail. If I decide not to go to work, I will have no income, etc. My life is totally my responsibility – how freeing this thought is!
Now to work: I must get my notebook and begin to document my day – every day. Soon a pattern will begin to emerge. The pattern is called my life and what I want out of it. Though this is an inexact science, it works. The only person who truly knows you and understands what you want out of this “piece of life” is you. Osho (3) tells us that there are no heroes or cowards, there is only action. To control the chaos, I must simply get to work on me. All answers truly lie within. The philosopher and writer, Paul Coelho (4), leaves us with a thought: To realize one’s destiny is a person’s only obligation.
A closing thought: It is easy to dispense advice. I make a habit of testing everyone’s counsel. If it pertains to me, it has value. If it doesn’t, it should be dismissed. There are, however, truisms that have come to us through the experience of ages. Not all history is foolish and not all contemporary pundits are telling the truth. We must develop a discerning intuition to tell truth from fiction as it relates to me. This is called the skill of critical thinking and how it connects to time – my time.
To sum up: This week, we spoke about my personal chaos and how I can control it.
To be noted: from Fr. Raimon Pannikar (5) –The goal of human nature, of any nature, is blessedness. If we do not reach this goal, it is a sign that we are headed in the wrong direction.
Just for fun: Sitar Legend Pt Ravi Shankar & his lovely Daughter Anoushka
For reflection: The Gaia Hypothesis
This week on your meditative walk, please ponder how you can control the chaos in your own life.
Every day look for something magical and beautiful
Quote: We all have such magnificent beauty within. We must only open our magical portal to have it enter into our physical and spiritual life.
Footnotes:
1) ‘Urgent studies needed’ into mental health impact of coronavirus
2) ForeverSpin Spinning Tops Review, Forget Everything You Know About Tops
3) Rajneesh
4) PAULO COELHO