I recently read an article on gratitude that really gave me pause: Like all of us, I live a busy life. At times, it seems that all the tasks related to my existence cannot be fulfilled: school, work, family, and friends all press their demands. It is easy to forget that we live in a first-world country that provides personal safety, and spiritual and financial opportunities; I do get blinded by the “daily grind.” The article, Nine Essential Reasons to Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude, (1) gives us reasons to feel the joy of being alive. It posits, “Do you want to live life to the fullest? Then one important thing you should do is cultivate an attitude of gratitude. What this means is that you should choose to view life in a positive way. Things might not happen your way, but you still choose to view them in a positive light. For instance, you speak positive words instead of negative ones.” What I enjoyed about the piece is that it is not naïve. It gives us a way to frame how we see life. “Far from being delusional or faith-based, having a positive outlook in difficult circumstances is not only an important predictor of resilience — how quickly people recover from adversity — but it is ‘the’ most important predictor of it. People who are resilient tend to be more positive and optimistic compared to less-resilient folks; they are better able to regulate their emotions, and they are able to maintain their optimism through the most trying circumstances.” This is what Dr. Dennis Charney, the dean of Mount Sinai School of Medicine, found when he examined approximately 750 Vietnam War veterans who were held as prisoners of war for six to eight years. Tortured and kept in solitary confinement, these 750 men were remarkably resilient. Unlike many fellow veterans, they did not develop depression or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) after their release, even though they endured extreme stress. What was their secret? After extensive interviews and tests, Dr. Charney noted ten characteristics that set them apart. The top one was optimism. The second was altruism. Humor and having a meaning in life — or something to live for — were also important. (2) I think that one of the major ways to feel this optimism is to create a nurturing environment. One example: we leave birdseed on our balcony. Our avian friends arrive at around 5 o’clock each morning; their soft cooing and chirping beckons the newfound day. It is impossible to feel frustrated and angry when your morning begins this way. Their arrival is a bellwether of what is to come: another magnificent day.
Continue reading Gratitude: sometimes I should get down and “just kiss the ground.”