Last week I spoke on the subject of time. I am always a little embarrassed when I touch on this topic: people appear to be so psychologically naked when they waste it. Time goes deep with people “to paraphrase Sir Ken Robison.” If people inveigle about some expanse of intimacy related to an occasion, it almost sounds pornographic. (1) It is like they have never really understood time and can only adumbrate some nonsensical activity: their money, their love life or their job. They pontificate about that expanse, but have not really uncovered it, not really probed it, nor lived it. Our digital world is making an individual’s entrance into a “virtual” space easier and easier. But, many times, when you open the door, there is nothing there. The virtual world is, well, virtual: not real, emotionless and blank. In the beginning of the substantial and truthful journey to discover yourself, there is always a moment of pain and suffering. Here you must be honest with your needs and desires: not those needs of your parents, friends and family. Do I really want to undertake this journey to the self? I must, must say yes – though I do not want to: I am afraid. Now the detritus of those who refuse to travel the “path” is in front of you. Could I be that broken, forlorn soul, you ask yourself? If one is honest, it is fear that pushes you forward: fear that that corrupted and broken being could actually become you. Osho’s (2) opinion (one of many): “The society, the church, the state: all want everyone to be in a state of constant fear: fear of the known, fear of the unknown, fear of death, fear of hell, fear of missing heaven, fear of not making your name in the world, fear of just being a ‘nobody.’ Everyone around you, from your very birth, is creating fear. No child is born with fear. Every child is born with freedom, doubt, rebellion, individuality, and innocence – all great qualities. But he is helpless and dependent.” Your response: “No, no, no never, not me.” This statement alone gives you courage.
You strap on your mountaineering boots (3) and take your first tepid steps. Once you slowly gain your footing, the trek becomes easier. One foot in front of the other – slowly, slowly. A small feeling of strength begins to grow within you. It is like warming your frostbitten hands in front of a fire: slowly the feeling comes. One of the most remarkable experiences I have had, and this happens again and again, is to simply tell a group of young students that their thinking is “not bad,” their test scores are “not bad,” their English is “not bad.” It is as if a freshet of optimism courses over an entire class: the negative teaching, (4) which I grew up with, is ineffectual and downright evil. All this form of attitude is doing is to alienate the vast majority of young adults: they hate work. “I don’t want to be a wage slave,” is the popular refrain. Then I ask, “All right, just what do you want to do?” There is usually no response. I had a somewhat bizarre occurrence this last week. I teach at a company that has recently hired several new employees. In my class (thankfully devoid of all senior staff and managers), a young person told me that he doesn’t know how long he will stay in this “job”: now he has been here two days and this is his first job. “Where are the parents?” I asked myself. This is a form of child abuse: if you do not prepare your child for life, what happens to them? In capitalism, you must work and work hard. Who is teaching the real model: an education + experience (at least, at least, 10,000 hours of underpaid and difficult work) = expertise. Then, maybe, you will be free: maybe not rich, but free: As the great master Confucius tells us, “Do what you love and you will never work again.” Mental death awaits those who “play it safe” in this dynamic world. Safety in any position, in a corporation, in the government, in the bureaucracy, is terminal, unless you make a special effort to continue to educate yourself: now, to be fair, some do, but not many. I remember my first job: there was no time for any studies. I got home at 8 o’clock, exhausted I might add. As naïve as it sounds, you must throw off the fetters and discover the real you: the exciting, original you. The real you is there and can be uncovered with effort and hard work. The great athlete gold medalist Summer Sanders (b. 1972) leaves us with a thought: “To be a champion, I think you have to see the big picture. It’s not about winning and losing; it’s about every day hard work and about thriving on a challenge. It’s about embracing the pain that you’ll experience at the end of a race and not being afraid. I think people think too hard and get afraid of a certain challenge.” I may add, the effort will “pay off,” in most circumstances. Life is fickle, but usually the traveler is rewarded: think Steve Jobs or any such entrepreneur.
A small joke: May Smith styled herself an erudite and worldly woman. In the affluent town in which she lived there were a plethora of elegant restaurants. She took to having lunch or dinner at a different establishment each weekend. One day she sat in a particularly pompous eatery. The waiters were as stiff as the linen napkins. She was eating her Cobb Salad (5) when she bit down on something small and hard. Extracting it from her mouth, she realized that it was a button. She immediately summoned the waiter. “Waiter, what is the meaning of this item in my salad.” “Thank you Madame,” was the reply. “I have been looking for that part of my wardrobe. It is expensive and very difficult to replace.”
This week, please ponder your personal mission in life.
Every day look for something magical and beautiful.
Quote: At some point in my life, I must set forth to discover what the universe has in store for me. If I fail to make the journey or only stay in a safe harbor, I will never discover what awaits me.
Footnotes:
1) Here the meaning is exploitive, prurient, indelicate and immoral. The more common meaning is to resemble adult or X-rated literature or movies. It is important to remember that English paints a picture. I counted 38 different words related to the word pornography.
2) Osho (1931-1990) was a spiritual teacher and mystic. Footnotes Footnotes
3) Mountaineering boots indicates firm and strong footwear.
4) Negative teaching means that a student is not truly encouraged and a deleterious situation exists between the student and teacher.
5) A Cobb Salad is a specialized main-dish salad.