If all happiness lies within, then all sadness must reside there, as well. We live in a society, however, that never wants to discuss melancholia and, in fact, tries to bury it like a dirty little secret. The superlative is always lauded – the fastest, the biggest, the most beautiful – but seldom do we hear – the slowest, the smallest or the ugliest. It would follow that one cannot exist without the other, as we have spoken of before. You need comparisons to give everything context, life and death being the most telling. Why are feelings of isolation and despondency quickly vanquished and sent to the “happy farm” of stimulation — drugs, alcohol and “rock and roll” — so these feeling cannot be truly experienced? In this fictitious world, everything is always sunny and filled with joy. There are no crises; there is no pain. This is just not reality, is it?
A clear sign of emotional maturity is how you deal with life’s frustrations without having to resort to some form of escapism. It would appear that as a civilization we are failing badly in this regard. “The surge of interest in happiness and public policy owes much to the case of the United States. Professor Richard Easterlin (1) (1974) famously noted 45 years ago that happiness in the US had remained unchanged from 1946 to 1970 despite the significant rise of GDP per person. This finding became known as the Easterlin Paradox. It has continued to hold true until today. Indeed, the average life evaluation in the United States, as measured by the Cantril ladder, (2) has declined during the past dozen years, from 7.2 in 2006 to 6.9 in 2018, despite ongoing U.S. economic growth. … An addiction, generally speaking, is a behavior like substance use, excessive gambling, or excessive use of digital media, which individuals pursue compulsively in the face of adverse consequences known to the individual. My argument is that the U.S. is suffering an epidemic of addictions, and that these addictions are leaving a rising portion of American society unhappy and a rising number clinically depressed.” (3)
It is not easy to view life as a prizefighter (4) and get into the ring. You will, most assuredly, get bruised and bloodied – but, struggle you must. We must be willing to view life as a grand adventure: not all good and not all bad, but dynamic and exciting. It is the only way we grow as beings. We always have our growth model: an education + experience = expertise. We cannot be fearful of the confrontational part of life. North American and European streets are littered with those who have given up the tussle to achieve self-discovery. For, if contentment lies within, then the tools to acquire its attributes must also be within our grasp. Ramana Maharishi (5) leaves us with a thought: If there is anything besides the Self, is there is reason to fear? Who sees the second? First, the ego arises and sees objects as external. If the ego does not rise, the Self alone exists and there is no second.
A closing thought: We receive a steady stream of perfection through the various information platforms. It is almost nauseating. Age teaches that life is a lot grittier than the incessant deluge of “glitz” suggests. Social media does a poor job, however, of painting reality as a great battle to overcome the vicissitudes of life. This does not sell fashion and “the good life” well. As individuals, I believe, we must actively promote that all is achievable, but not instantaneously, and not without hard work. If you are willing to put a determined and sustained effort into your life, you will achieve your goals, or at least get on the path towards them — their ultimate success being a product of good fortune and the vagaries of life.
To sum up: This week, we spoke about sadness and how it cannot just be “shooed away.” It is a component of life along with happiness.
A philosophical question: Why does your phone always run out of power only when you forget your charger?
Just for fun – Anne Sophie-Mutter – Mendelssohn Violin Concerto in E minor
This week, on your thoughtful stroll, please ponder how best to speak with a friend in need. Friends are like fine wine – they must be handled gently.
Every day look for something magical and beautiful.
Quote: I must take full responsibility for my philosophical development.
Footnotes:
2) Measuring Your Happiness—and the World’s
3) Addiction and Unhappiness in America
4) This refers to a professional boxer