I am sure this is a very common experience: we slowly begin to open our perceptual eyes at twenty or so and quickly come to realize that there are many other forms in the world. Some appear to be inanimate like rocks or mountains or the sky, and others are animate and scurry, jump or fly about. Whatever their agitation, we quickly comprehend that everything is separate and distinct from me. A freshet of fear and loneliness is presented — then it calms and then it dissipates. You realize that you are alone in the world.
This is not the psychological trauma depicted in horror films or tragic novels. This is a greatly liberating statement. All power literally lies within and is accessed through our five senses (our sense of sight, smell, taste, touch, and hearing) and, of course, our six sense which enjoins us with the universe, Gaia, etc. We are free to create the reality that we so desire. With the caveats: life isn’t easy, life is fickle and I am born with my own unique set of givens. (1)
We then set about to form relationships in our reality as we see it: This is not straightforward and maybe it is not supposed to be. It is in Plato’s Apology (38a5-6) that we hear Socrates (469-399 BC) say “The unexamined life is not worth living.” The concept of free will (2) is a tedious one and is unpleasant to accept as true – even though, I believe, it is a veracious concept. If you speak with many downtrodden human beings, you will hear a litany of excuses as to why I am the way I am – “I lost all my money, I lost my wife, I had a ‘run of bad luck,’” and so on. None of this, rather sadly, changes the reality of what is. It is only the individual who can do that. (3) My world quite literally is how I see it. It is at this point that a mentor is crucial.
This individual, be it a parent, friend or family member, is not a teacher. At over sixty years of age, I have come to believe that the self is the only real teacher. This individual is an educator, a locksmith, who can but give you a key to unlock the potential that you, and only you, possess. (The relationship between Elvis Presley, “the king of rock and roll,” (4) and his manager, Colonel Tom Parker is an interesting one. History has yet to fully judge its integrity, (5) but its results are iconic.)
My mentor was my grandfather. In my life, he is the closest I have ever come to having a real connection with someone or something. He filled me with a sense of curiosity about life. When you entered his small, elegantly furnished home, you were struck by the scent of sandalwood. (6) I initially had no idea what the smell was, but you were transported somewhere. Star Trek (7) was on the television propelling my imagination even further. He imbued me with a desire for elegance and excellence in all my actions and with great humility for being given the gift of life – my life.
He was rather stern and made it quite clear that I was in control of what I wanted from life, not the other way around – that life had predetermined what it wanted from me. At the onset, I was afraid and then I realized that I had to get to work on that examination of me. Philosopher and poet, Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882) leaves us with a thought: Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. (8)
A closing thought: I struggle with relationships all the time. Their interactions have taught me patience. When I see an erratic driver or a frustrated individual, I realize that they do not perceive the freedom that they possess within. We are all imperfect beings. It is with great modesty that we must suggest to others that they can adopt this imperfect ideal, that of inner freedom if they so wish to truly improve their lives. All of us are free to choose the kind of life we wish to live.
To sum up: This week, we spoke about individual responsibility in the face of the adversity of life.
A philosophical question: Why does your tooth stop hurting when you arrive at a hastily arranged dental appointment – why are you so embarrassed?
Just for fun –Julia Fischer
This week, on your peripatetic walk please reflect on the power that resides within.
Every day look for something magical and beautiful.
Quote: Though I am blinded by the glare of life, I must find a way to focus my vision.
Footnotes:
2) Free will
3) Greatest Secret to Success Short
4) This phrase was initially publicized by Hedda Hopper, an American actress and gossip columnist