We live in a world that lauds action but seems unwilling to truly accept its consequences. “Action and inaction are both actions” is an unacceptable mantra in the post-Millennial age. (1) Are we prepared to be responsible, accept failure in ourselves and others, and then forgive or ask for forgiveness? “You are the people of God; He loved you and chose you for His own. So then, you must clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Be tolerant with one another and forgive one another whenever any of you has a complaint against someone else. You must forgive one another just as the Lord has forgiven you.” Colossians 3:12-13. (2) I believe that basic morality is innate and should, therefore, give us the tools that are necessary to answer the aforementioned question in the affirmative. Error and failure certainly produce a certain level of guilt. But, many seemingly refuse to accept responsibility for life: why? That said, few people would fail to take umbrage at the notion of stealing or more serious social transgressions. We all understand the concept of the Ten Commandments. There is, however, an elasticity associated with certain forms of behavior: I am speaking of being responsible for one’s actions. To truly forgive yourself, you must first accept your own mistakes: my life is my fault.
The other day, one of our clients related a story: They have quite a large number of employees and the business is busy; hence their people are fully occupied. They manufacture internationally –exported products and, because of a dearth of qualified people in Taiwan, are more than willing to train new staff members. The firm seems like a wonderful place to work and I note the word “work.” Recently, some young individuals wanted to quit: stressing that the pace of activity was overwhelming. They informed their manager who, placed in an untenable position, acceded to their demands. The only thing he requested in return was that their ongoing projects be finished: perhaps taking less than five working days. This was quickly agreed to. The next morning, disappointingly, no one arrived at their station. How is this possible, you may ask?
The ensuing work –related chaos punctuated how different the values of this generation (known as Generation Y or the Millennial Generation) truly are, relative to other generations. Jean Twenge, the author of the book Generation Me (ISBN 978-07432-769-86) considers Millennials along with the younger post-Millennials to be part of what she calls Generation Me. Dr.Twenge attributes confidence and tolerance to the Millennials but also to a sense of entitlement and narcissism. This group, when faced with its own Existential angst, will have psychological and structural problems. The maxim of our time in history is that “there are no jobs.” How then do we live out fulfilling and interesting lives? Many educators state that the only path is through passion: we must love what we do. Work cannot be only associated with a pecuniary return. I believe that one of the greatest gifts of life is your acceptance of your past: the good and the not-so-good. The concept of regret, contemporary suffering for a historical event, is nothing short of funny. I am not God and cannot return to the past to ameliorate a given situation: lessons are its only rewards.
This week in one of our high school classes we spoke about the great German-language poet, Rilke (1875-1925). He was a transitional poet moving between the traditional and the modern world. As with many intellectuals and artists of his day, he never truly psychologically overcame the chaos and the collapse of the old social order because of World War One, and its segue into the new. We can now sense a similar change in the air. What will happen to those who are not prepared for change and the new century? Rilke leaves us with a thought: This is the miracle that happens every time to those who really love: the more they give, the more they possess (parts of this essay were first published in May 2013).
A closing thought: Recently, there has been a lot of talk about proper cell phone usage. We only have to attend a bus stop to listen to the silence that befalls a population “glued” to its phones. What at first blush appeared to be a momentary trend, however, is beginning to have more dire social consequences. I have been reading snippets here and there of these concerns without really paying too much attention. This behavior was made very intimate just last week. I was at a 7-11 having a brief lunch and was seated across from a good-looking woman in her thirties with two equally attractive two- year-old girls. Their mother was, what could be only described as, transfixed to her phone. In the thirty minutes that I sat reading my newspaper, she socially interacted with her daughters, her condescension would suggest “her” children, for less than two minutes — or less: madness and, more tellingly, psychological child abuse. Steve and I are starting a new campaign: Put down your cell phone – listen to your children, speak with your children and read together for your children.
An amusing occurrence: Referring back to my male GPS, I have become more and more careful about my “lost” sense of direction. I have been asked too many times, “Why didn’t you just find it on Goggle Maps?” The other day in the pouring rain (Why does this always occur in a deluge?), I had to find the address of a new client. After close to two hours and many stops and starts at a garage or convenience store, I discovered the address. I was thrilled with my command of modern technology until I realized that the location was, in reality, only two blocks from our office. My dog could have found the venue faster.
Just for fun: Jethro Tull – Thick as a brick
This week, please ponder how to make forgiving, in all its myriad forms, a part of your life, as well.
Every day look for something magical and beautiful.
Quote: When I accept the reality of what is, a sense of where I am, and an understanding of why I am — I am ready to move forward in my life.
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